Marriage: an option, not an ultimate goal

Marriage is not the ultimate purpose of human life. It’s merely an option.

I’ve heard too many men and women, complain, fret and become anxious as they find themselves single after a certain age. The idea that it takes a significant other to COMPLETE a man or woman, is not just outrageous, but sad. The only thing that completes one’s soul is the Holy Spirit of God(<– that one is for the believer). If you cannot be complete and whole as single individual, you will never be happy in a relationship. Therefore enjoy being single. The truth is, singleness is the biggest blessing you can ever have, and the perfect time to live out His will to the fullest, without any distractions. If you desire marriage, by all means, pray about it, pray for and wait for the right man or woman. But do not just settle for anyone who gets dumped on your path.

If marriage was God’s will and purpose for every person, then poor Mother Teresa didn’t live out her calling. Yet Mother Teresa, single and all, did more for world and took care of more children in the world, than any of us ever will. Do you think she could have had the same impact if she had a husband and children of her own?

A wedding, is not an achievement, it’s an occasion. It doesn’t take rocket science or any real talent or intelligence to get married. What follows a wedding is a lot of hard, hard, hard work.

Jesus said, “At the resurrection people will neither marry nor be given in marriage; they will be like the angels in heaven.” Matthew 22:30

He also said,”Your Kingdom come on earth as it is in heaven.”

Don’t let yourself come to point where the only thing worth knowing about you, is the man or woman you’re with. You, alone, have an identity and purpose. Find it, fulfill it, and if marriage was a part of the journey then embrace it. Otherwise, know and understand that marriage is not vital to survival, success, or happiness.

R. A. Douglas

February 5, 2018.


  1. I am getting married this year, and I couldn’t agree more. If your life has a greater purpose, then you can be happy when you’re single and happy when you’re married. I am hopeful that my husband and I will be supportive of each other as we fulfill our purpose in life.

    1. I wish you a blessed and successful marriage. And that both of you work through everything with no egos, but plenty of unconditional love and one mindedness. Don’t ever forget your on the same team. πŸ™‚ πŸ₯‚

  2. Well said, I concur! In a sense, it can lean both ways. Personally, I feel like marriage is an option because, in the beginning, God created marriage which is performed between man and woman however in the new testament, Paul mentions that singleness can sometimes be the ideal. I guess what I’m trying to say is it all depends on whether or not the person can withstand being single or married. So to say that someone is the reason for you being complete is faulty, a spouse is merely an addition to your life.

  3. WOW! Father is GOOD! A sister! WELCOME to my path in the Presence of Him Whom we love. It’s 6:38 am here in Amman, Jordan. Just finished my mini walk around the roof track Father has provided for me. Is such a blessing to have a Father–Husband–Redeemer–Master–Supplier of all the needs that NO human husband or father or brother could ever fulfill! He knows I needed to hear: “The only thing that completes one’s soul is the Holy Spirit of God…..”

    Wow! Ready! Let’s follow His Spirit within us as we travel with an angel band heading towards His Kingdom soon on the new earth to be found. There is no sorrow in our lives for Yahuwah/Yahushua have taken us into His Beloved! What a marvel to continue with the task to share His Presence in my life. Much love, your sister. πŸ™‚

    Here is another site where I share the Family A True Story:

  4. Sadly, I learned this too late, but I am still grateful for the family my marriage did create, and for the lessons learned. Now just abiding in the love of God each day.
    Thank you for the truth you expressed.

    1. I always tell people to wait, and getting done everything they can get done as a single person first, because it’s all that much harder once you have a family. And there’s no cutting corners with family, right? Otherwise, you end up with broken kids and or broken yourself. One has to be willing to put in work if they desire marriage.

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